Gumby and Oprah

If your head is completely lopsided there is an excellent chance that CPD wants YOU! in jail. This lopsided robber attacked a woman in her BMW on West Seventh St. Hmm, there's a lesson to be learned here. West Seventh = OTR, so don't give crackheads the impression that you have money and certainly don't live there! GEEZ LOUISE! And who's head looks like this? This douche looks like a half-breed between human and Gumby.

So, look for this guy.....at least he doesn't look like rectangles. Thanks to some total moron, North 71 was closed one morning last week for a few hours. No, it did not invoncenience my life in any way, but it totally irritates me when stupid accidents happen. Some moron in an SUV crossed the median and played pinball among 3 northbound cars. Anyone familiar with the area knows that the median isn't THAT tiny. How is it possible that you just off-road right through it and run into old people? Ok, not OLD, because the lady is younger than my parents, but REGARDLESS! Unless you have a heart attack at the wheel, what are you doing off-roading on the interstate? These are the accidents that irritate me, because they always happen during rush hour. It's like stupids wait for the perfect time to aggravate. Douche Bag of (last) WEEK! (and my dad would LOVE this one)...OPRAH! Look Harpo, I don't care how much money you have or how much you hate James Frey, you can't just crash weddings. Oprah apparently crashed a few weddings this weekend. Apparently she was "dropping off gifts" which sounds like a cheap excuse to grab a handful of pizza bagels or pigs in a blanket. In most of the pictures she looks totally annoyed by people talking to her. Hey Oprah! Don't draw attention to yourself and then get annoyed. Oh Oprah..I am so not a fan. McFINE! A Pennsylvania woman is being fined for tossing her McSalad out the window. She actually got a ticket, but brilliant decided she didn't need to show up for court. She is now arguing that her McYuck was not trash, because it's lettuce and it's biodegradable. This isn't holding up on court, probably because the judge is too busy laughing at her. Listen lady, it's McSlop, that's not real lettuce. Enjoy that $180 salad....