8th Awesome of Christmas

the 8th awesome of christmas has nothing to do with meijer..yay! everyone clap, but don't get the clap..because that will NOT make this list, considering there is nothing awesome about that. anyways...here it is: Grandma gives cash.

why this is awesome actually has NOTHING to do with cash. it has to do with the fact that grandma is 86 years old and has been blind for the last 14 years or so. she's not shopping anywhere, because she's too feisty to put up with mallrats and there would be a purse-swinging hate crime fo sho! that and she can't walk more than 50 feet without needing a rest (God bless her heart, she even splurged for the deluxe walker with the built in seat)..thus she hands out the kiz-ash.

cash is dispersed in a hierarchical manner. (3) kids & their spouses receive one amount,(7) grandkids & their spouses receive a lesser amount and finally (10) great-grandchildren receive an even lesser amount. I'll be honest, it's not a HUGE amount of money, but it's also a decent amount that we grand & great-grand kids are receiving...so great-grandkids should shut their pie-holes and be lucky they have a great-grandma who is so fabulous!

here is where the cash gets key, so pay close attention or you won't get the awesome and if i have to explain it i'm going to commit a hate crime of my own. there are only 2 grand-daughters: Brenda (oldest grandchild, Jabba the Hut stunt double, societal shame & thief of grandma's money) and myself (youngest grandchild, Olive Oil stunt double, 8th wonder of the world & not robbing my grandma blind after having filed for bankruptcy). Brenda is like 42 and her oldest (illegitimate) child is only 8 days younger than myself. so, brenda somehow discovered that my husband was receiving more christmas money from dear, sweet grandma than her spawn because aaron is a grandchild & her minions are only great-grandchildren. so, brenda breaches this subject with my grandma who replies "aaron is a grandchild, jess & daniel are great-grandchildren. if you think they should have more money, maybe you should tell their grandmother to give it to them." i heart grandma & all things that annoy brenda. however..brenda learned to rob grandma from her mom...so in essence, if their grandmother DID give them more money, it would only be coming from my grandma's pocket anyways.